[ Mizuki starts to shift himself out of the pile of toys about halfway through Caoimhe's explanation, closing whatever distance is between them. Finally, when she finishes, he pulls her in for a hug, carefully petting a hand against the back of her head. ]
Shh, you don't have anything to apologize for. I hadn't meant to scare you. I'm sorry for that! I'll eat somewhere more private next time, okay?
How funny you would think I would eat Chung, though~! You are all good people, you know? I'd never do that to any of you while you were still alive, okay? So you don't have to worry about that.
[ He drops his head to settle his chin against her shoulder. ]
Besides, you're not too far off. I mean, what kind of non-monster causes people to go mad and allows his friends to get hurt like that, right~?
[ When the other hugs her, she leans into it more and holds far tighter than he had. ]
... I know... I'm sorry... [ She felt like a bad friend, to have thought that Mizuki would ever do something like that. Unable to accept in that moment, something about him that scared her - it was wrong, of her to not accept him as he is. Especially in a moment, that Mizuki himself was clearly helping them all with. ]
B-But... I don't know why - I don't understand why you eat others like that... [ But Gods consume people, Devils eat souls, and living beings eat animals - it's all the same ultimately. ] ... But, I know Mizuki only does things because he cares about all of us... So I know what you were doing was to help us, and it's okay... [ Her locks of hair seem to drown the other's face within it. Her voice gets a bit quieter, and she holds him still without letting him go. ] S-Sometimes we hurt each other... But... I-It's okay, that's why... That's why I came here to talk to you because even if you didn't realize it... Even if you didn't understand - I still h-hurt you Mizuki, and I wanted you to know... I am sorry... I-I will do better.
Caoimhe, it's alright. There's no reason to be so beside yourself~. You really don't have to apologize to me. I didn't think you were doing poorly or anything. You were scared and there was a lot going on. That's a completely reasonable reaction, okay?
[ He combs his fingers through her hair. ]
I do care about all of you. Would it calm you any if I told you why I did it?
[ She listens to his warm voice, and is glad that he did not find her a terrible friend. Pulling back away from him, she looks to find his face. Attempting to rub the tears from her eyes. ] W-were you H-hungry...? [ I mean why else do you eat? ]
Ehehe, I mean, yes~. But I'm always hungry, so, not quite that.
[ Endless, insatiable, eldritch hunger is a bitch sometimes. ]
My mentor taught me how to… absorb all the goodness around me and share that unto others. But, even more than that, he taught me how to expel the evil within myself.
[ Mizuki offers out his own gloved hand, attempting to help wipe away some of those tears. ]
Taking someone's evil into myself means I can get rid of it. So I try to eat the things I kill to absolve them of that. It's… a little different here, since things "respawn", so it's not like there's an afterlife or anything like that, but… if I can offer just a little bit of solace, I'm going to try.
.. That must be horrible to feel so hungry and be unable to eat... [ She gives the other a quaint frown, concerned over their wellbeing completely. ]
You can... Eat evil..? And... Share goodness...? [ Never in her life had she ever heard about such an ability - it is so unique and intricate... sadly they never got to the eldritch abominations stuff, so Caoimhe knows NOTHING about that mess. ]
If you consume them.. Then... When their soul is freed - they no longer are tainted by the darkness of evil?
[ Her eyes are blinking and she seems to try to put thoughts together. ]
Mhm. Their evil no longer has to affect and fester in the world. They're free to the afterlife without and burdens to bear and able to provide nutrients, too. Really, it's the best way to go.
…
Plus, it'll be nice to not have a massive, rotting corpse over there. [ Just, you know, as an after thought. ]
T-that is amazing... It doesn't hurt you in anyway...?
[ She comes from people who use every part of a body!!! Because its important!! They burn their dead so they don't become undead and spread their ashes into the winds!! She totally supports you. ]
Mmmh, well... [ He considers this for a moment. It wouldn't hurt to tell her some form of the truth, he thinks. "Hurts," no, but "alters"... sometimes.
...
He decides against telling her. ]
Not that I can think of, no. Does that make it a little better? I'll still eat more privately, of course.
[ All she heard was: i cleanse the souls of the dying when i eat them. ]
... I... I don't think I can watch - ultimately, the body of a living being is so holy - in itself. Even if they... Die.. ... To watch it desecrated in that way is still hurtful despite your ability...
[ Though the more she thinks about it... ]
... Does that mean... Youre a God?
[ I cant remember if she asked this before - Caoimhe would remember BUT ME THE MUN? GON GAGA. ]
I understand. I don't want you to be uncomfortable. I'm real sorry I scared you before, I hope you'll forgive me for that.
[ Sounds like she already has, of course, but he doesn't want to assume anything. Maybe she came to apologize and also be like "but fuck you for doing that you little bitch" or something like that.
Her next question stumps him a little bit, though. The answer should be "Of course not". And, to some extent, it is, to Mizuki. (But there's a lot of intricacies to We Many, isn't there?) No, no, he can't talk about that. Ah, he's better off just avoiding answering altogether. He doesn't want to continue lying to Caoimhe. ]
..Sometimes, we scare each other. [ Her arms shift gently around his shoulders. Leaning into give him a hug before pulling back again, and letting the two of them comfortably drift a part. ] Sometimes, we get angry at one another... And that's okay, because we all have feelings and... We can come together, to talk about them or overcome things that may not.. Make sense to us?
[ At least in regards to this moment. A pause, as she is hesitant to answer his question. ]
... Do you not..? [ Mizuki may not give his feelings away physically, but in the intricacies of his own personality. Caoimhe finds perhaps her question weighed uncomfortably on his shoulders. ] Do you not, like that question?
You're very kind, Caoimhe. [ He's going to thumb at some of the tearstains on her cheeks. ] Next time, you needn't cry for me, though. I promise, no matter what, I'll always consider you my friend, okay? Worrying otherwise will just make you emotionally exhausted!
[ And he's going to hold her hands now. He's very touchy - if he can't keep hugging, then this works for him. ]
I wouldn't say that, no. It's just certainly a weird question to ask, isn't it~? I mean, depending on what your definition of "godhood" is, maybe we all are? We can't technically "die", we have different abilities, we're from different worlds, we've been reincarnated as entirely new people - there's so much there that could be traits of godhood.
... Thank you Mizuki. [ Truly a kind friend, what more could she have asked for? The gentleness of his touch, wiping away the tears makes her feel validated - here, grounded, alive, appreciated, loved. A tenderness she wasn't inherently always afforded, especially with how easily she could cry.
But Gods..? ]
No, [ She says, kindly but there is a push of certainty to her voice now. ] A God is nothing like us.. Yet you are right, we can become Gods. I have heard legends of those who even Ao could not overlook and granted them ascension... But...
[ As she speaks trying to recall memories and thinks hard on it, the lyre at her side begins to glitten slightly. Exuding an aura of magic itself. ]
Gods have these things called Portfolios.. Yes, without them, the Gods would not gain power from our prayers or respect. Instead, they would diminish in power, and likely disappear into the aetherial planes... I suppose that does not answer your question.
[ She had looked away in thought but returned her eyes towards the other more endearingly once more. ]
To me, the Gods whether they are foul-mannered or gracious. Are beings who live beyond our understanding, they are not meant to be understood but all the same - worshiped and learned from. They are our creators and may not understand us as mortals, but rely on us all the same as we too look to them for answers.
We are the essence of what it means to be synergetic, a foul God should be stopped but to destroyed!?!? Outright, would only mean the demise of Mortalkind.
[ She shakes her head frowning, ]
I merely mean, to myself. Gods are above me, and I can only exist below them ultimately.
Hmm~ hmmmm!!! What a very specific explanation. But I don't think even Gods can be bound by definitions, can they?
[ Happily, he swings their hands together, and sways a little in his spot as well. Mizuki may have been raised by cultists in a Church, but he's really not a religious person. He believes in what the Arbor stands for, and what it once provided and did, but there are some... complicated feelings there. There's some complicated feelings for We Many. There's a lot of... jumbled, complicated... stuff. ]
If the Gods created creatures, then are those creatures not also God? They must be pieces of them, at least, surely? I believe there are simply people who earn respect and even prayer, but those people are not necessarily good, or even gods, right? So, then, where is the divide?
If Gods are simply something we cannot understand, then are many, many Gods that differ between people, even. For instance, I don't understand emotions all that well. Does that make it my God~?
[ Before she has the chance to answer, Mizuki lets go of one of her hands and pulls the other up, guiding her into a little twirl before giving a bright, sunny laugh. ] I don't think anyone can truly define divinity.
Oh you know this..? [ Caoimhe's face lights up as their hands swing about, the lyre at her side still ebbing a hue of magic to it. ] Yes... Yes you are right - Ao took themself and placed a part of them into each one of us, that is why...
[ As swift as she seemed to smile, she frowns gently. ]
That is why the Beast, takes our souls and consumes it - making certain we are never reborn again. He wants the small parts of Ao within us, so that he can become stronger then he is... [ Yes she will talk about the facts of her world like it is nothing, she has done this in the campaign its a thing. ]
But ah -
[ she twirls a bit mystified, did he want to dance? Caoimhe had not danced for some time, and the movement of her twirl made her feel balanced in some way. When she enters back before him. She looks at either side of him and gently comes close and moves a bit as if to dance. ]
That is what I mean... But we, as living beings... We are defined, and part of that is by the Gods in some way...
While the Gods are divided mainly by the power in their hands, but also the laws of the cosmos that we know nothing of... And maybe just, will never understand... Yes... I think that's okay...
I also think that. [ A small smile. ] If Mizuki is a God, he would be a Great God. A kindest one, yes! I would hope your people will dance to the ocean waves, sing your songs, and represent the strength that is in your heart.
[ LMAO thats totally fine. She is with the help of Mizuki, actually remembering things from the her that lived farther than she came from. Though she may not be able to retain that Caoimhe's ability or power... She is remembering some of those memories. He is helping, without realizing it. ]
Mm! That's okay - I-I am most endeared by it... [ It is a quiet gentle dance, Caoimhe feels the moment deeply. ] I love who you are, simply as you are, that is why I was so sad... To have felt scared of you before.
I felt that I betrayed you, Mizuki... Despite how much I love you. [ She leans in a bit closer, at least despite the tears that still seemed to sit on her cheeks from moments before. Caoimhe is able to smile truly for the other. ] Thank you for understanding me, and being so kind... Always... I am happy to have met you, am happy that Mizuki is just Mizuki.
[ Mizuki's movements are fluid and very loose. Almost... impossible, for someone without the structure of a jellyfish. But he keeps dancing! It's fun, and he doesn't want to see her cry, and it's certainly a nice contrast from this topic. ]
Mmh, I'm glad Caoimhe is Caoimhe, too. I think... [ A rumbling in his head, the whispers of the collective, the thoughts of We Many, the voice he can never discern from his own. ] I think the Gods are overrated, anyway.
Mm... [ She is grateful. ] I love the Gods. [ Caoimhe says gently, finding herself fascinated by his fluid movements. She almost starts to purposely try to move them so she can see them for herself. ] But I love all living things the most.
[ Somewhere her mother's own heart cries, knowing her daughter is so much like her. ]
[ Caoimhe cants her head, a bit perturbed. We? She feels she made him sad... After a moment, the two continue and then she softly says. ]
... Mizuki, I.. I wanted to show you something... I am not sure how the spell will work, but... I would be comfortable if you were here with me while I cast it... Do you want to see?
[ He has a lot of feelings about Gods. Hard not to, when there’s some in your head. He feels especially bad for the ones who were wronged. He feels especially bad for the Arbor. ]
Of course. [ But now isn’t the time to think about that. He’s back to his infinite cheer. ] What is it?
Um... Is there somewhere with more open space... Could we go outside for a bit..? [ Caoimhe stops their little dance and squeezes his hands, to move a way a bit. Pulling out her new lyre and holding it in each of her hands. ]
[ Oh! Okay. No more dancing. That's fine. He'll just nod and start to head for the door. He seems equal parts curious and excited, honestly. Magic? More magic?? He'd like to see. He still doesn't understand how it works, but- ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
mooninthewater) wrote2023-08-16 12:10 pm
no subject
Shh, you don't have anything to apologize for. I hadn't meant to scare you. I'm sorry for that! I'll eat somewhere more private next time, okay?
How funny you would think I would eat Chung, though~! You are all good people, you know? I'd never do that to any of you while you were still alive, okay? So you don't have to worry about that.
[ He drops his head to settle his chin against her shoulder. ]
Besides, you're not too far off. I mean, what kind of non-monster causes people to go mad and allows his friends to get hurt like that, right~?
no subject
... I know... I'm sorry... [ She felt like a bad friend, to have thought that Mizuki would ever do something like that. Unable to accept in that moment, something about him that scared her - it was wrong, of her to not accept him as he is. Especially in a moment, that Mizuki himself was clearly helping them all with. ]
B-But... I don't know why - I don't understand why you eat others like that... [ But Gods consume people, Devils eat souls, and living beings eat animals - it's all the same ultimately. ] ... But, I know Mizuki only does things because he cares about all of us... So I know what you were doing was to help us, and it's okay... [ Her locks of hair seem to drown the other's face within it. Her voice gets a bit quieter, and she holds him still without letting him go. ] S-Sometimes we hurt each other... But... I-It's okay, that's why... That's why I came here to talk to you because even if you didn't realize it... Even if you didn't understand - I still h-hurt you Mizuki, and I wanted you to know... I am sorry... I-I will do better.
no subject
[ He combs his fingers through her hair. ]
I do care about all of you. Would it calm you any if I told you why I did it?
no subject
no subject
[ Endless, insatiable, eldritch hunger is a bitch sometimes. ]
My mentor taught me how to… absorb all the goodness around me and share that unto others. But, even more than that, he taught me how to expel the evil within myself.
[ Mizuki offers out his own gloved hand, attempting to help wipe away some of those tears. ]
Taking someone's evil into myself means I can get rid of it. So I try to eat the things I kill to absolve them of that. It's… a little different here, since things "respawn", so it's not like there's an afterlife or anything like that, but… if I can offer just a little bit of solace, I'm going to try.
no subject
You can... Eat evil..? And... Share goodness...? [ Never in her life had she ever heard about such an ability - it is so unique and intricate... sadly they never got to the eldritch abominations stuff, so Caoimhe knows NOTHING about that mess. ]
If you consume them.. Then... When their soul is freed - they no longer are tainted by the darkness of evil?
[ Her eyes are blinking and she seems to try to put thoughts together. ]
no subject
…
Plus, it'll be nice to not have a massive, rotting corpse over there. [ Just, you know, as an after thought. ]
no subject
T-that is amazing... It doesn't hurt you in anyway...?
[ She comes from people who use every part of a body!!! Because its important!! They burn their dead so they don't become undead and spread their ashes into the winds!! She totally supports you. ]
no subject
Mmmh, well... [ He considers this for a moment. It wouldn't hurt to tell her some form of the truth, he thinks. "Hurts," no, but "alters"... sometimes.
...
He decides against telling her. ]
Not that I can think of, no. Does that make it a little better? I'll still eat more privately, of course.
no subject
... I... I don't think I can watch - ultimately, the body of a living being is so holy - in itself. Even if they... Die.. ... To watch it desecrated in that way is still hurtful despite your ability...
[ Though the more she thinks about it... ]
... Does that mean... Youre a God?
[ I cant remember if she asked this before - Caoimhe would remember BUT ME THE MUN? GON GAGA. ]
no subject
[ Sounds like she already has, of course, but he doesn't want to assume anything. Maybe she came to apologize and also be like "but fuck you for doing that you little bitch" or something like that.
Her next question stumps him a little bit, though. The answer should be "Of course not". And, to some extent, it is, to Mizuki. (But there's a lot of intricacies to We Many, isn't there?) No, no, he can't talk about that. Ah, he's better off just avoiding answering altogether. He doesn't want to continue lying to Caoimhe. ]
What's a god to you, Caoimhe?
no subject
[ At least in regards to this moment. A pause, as she is hesitant to answer his question. ]
... Do you not..? [ Mizuki may not give his feelings away physically, but in the intricacies of his own personality. Caoimhe finds perhaps her question weighed uncomfortably on his shoulders. ] Do you not, like that question?
no subject
[ And he's going to hold her hands now. He's very touchy - if he can't keep hugging, then this works for him. ]
I wouldn't say that, no. It's just certainly a weird question to ask, isn't it~? I mean, depending on what your definition of "godhood" is, maybe we all are? We can't technically "die", we have different abilities, we're from different worlds, we've been reincarnated as entirely new people - there's so much there that could be traits of godhood.
no subject
But Gods..? ]
No, [ She says, kindly but there is a push of certainty to her voice now. ] A God is nothing like us.. Yet you are right, we can become Gods. I have heard legends of those who even Ao could not overlook and granted them ascension... But...
[ As she speaks trying to recall memories and thinks hard on it, the lyre at her side begins to glitten slightly. Exuding an aura of magic itself. ]
Gods have these things called Portfolios.. Yes, without them, the Gods would not gain power from our prayers or respect. Instead, they would diminish in power, and likely disappear into the aetherial planes... I suppose that does not answer your question.
[ She had looked away in thought but returned her eyes towards the other more endearingly once more. ]
To me, the Gods whether they are foul-mannered or gracious. Are beings who live beyond our understanding, they are not meant to be understood but all the same - worshiped and learned from. They are our creators and may not understand us as mortals, but rely on us all the same as we too look to them for answers.
We are the essence of what it means to be synergetic, a foul God should be stopped but to destroyed!?!? Outright, would only mean the demise of Mortalkind.
[ She shakes her head frowning, ]
I merely mean, to myself. Gods are above me, and I can only exist below them ultimately.
no subject
[ Happily, he swings their hands together, and sways a little in his spot as well. Mizuki may have been raised
by cultistsin a Church, but he's really not a religious person. He believes in what the Arbor stands for, and what it once provided and did, but there are some... complicated feelings there. There's some complicated feelings for We Many. There's a lot of... jumbled, complicated... stuff. ]If the Gods created creatures, then are those creatures not also God? They must be pieces of them, at least, surely? I believe there are simply people who earn respect and even prayer, but those people are not necessarily good, or even gods, right? So, then, where is the divide?
If Gods are simply something we cannot understand, then are many, many Gods that differ between people, even. For instance, I don't understand emotions all that well. Does that make it my God~?
[ Before she has the chance to answer, Mizuki lets go of one of her hands and pulls the other up, guiding her into a little twirl before giving a bright, sunny laugh. ] I don't think anyone can truly define divinity.
no subject
[ As swift as she seemed to smile, she frowns gently. ]
That is why the Beast, takes our souls and consumes it - making certain we are never reborn again. He wants the small parts of Ao within us, so that he can become stronger then he is... [ Yes she will talk about the facts of her world like it is nothing, she has done this in the campaign its a thing. ]
But ah -
[ she twirls a bit mystified, did he want to dance? Caoimhe had not danced for some time, and the movement of her twirl made her feel balanced in some way. When she enters back before him. She looks at either side of him and gently comes close and moves a bit as if to dance. ]
That is what I mean... But we, as living beings... We are defined, and part of that is by the Gods in some way...
While the Gods are divided mainly by the power in their hands, but also the laws of the cosmos that we know nothing of... And maybe just, will never understand... Yes... I think that's okay...
I also think that. [ A small smile. ] If Mizuki is a God, he would be a Great God. A kindest one, yes! I would hope your people will dance to the ocean waves, sing your songs, and represent the strength that is in your heart.
no subject
I do not believe that we are defined, actually. Not when we have so many things that make us unique, if we are truly pieces of a whole.
[ Mizuki will absolutely start to sway with Caoimhe, a songless little dance to keep up the energy. To keep Caoimhe happy. ]
Ehehe, you think so~? It's too bad, then, that I'm not a God. I don't even fit your definition a little bit. I'm just Mizuki.
no subject
Mm! That's okay - I-I am most endeared by it... [ It is a quiet gentle dance, Caoimhe feels the moment deeply. ] I love who you are, simply as you are, that is why I was so sad... To have felt scared of you before.
I felt that I betrayed you, Mizuki... Despite how much I love you. [ She leans in a bit closer, at least despite the tears that still seemed to sit on her cheeks from moments before. Caoimhe is able to smile truly for the other. ] Thank you for understanding me, and being so kind... Always... I am happy to have met you, am happy that Mizuki is just Mizuki.
no subject
Mmh, I'm glad Caoimhe is Caoimhe, too. I think... [ A rumbling in his head, the whispers of the collective, the thoughts of We Many, the voice he can never discern from his own. ] I think the Gods are overrated, anyway.
no subject
[ Somewhere her mother's own heart cries, knowing her daughter is so much like her. ]
no subject
... [ He squeezes her hands, still smiling, still upbeat, not slowing down with his dancing, but... his voice sounds just a tinge forlorn. ]
And that is why we would make terrible Gods.
no subject
... Mizuki, I.. I wanted to show you something... I am not sure how the spell will work, but... I would be comfortable if you were here with me while I cast it... Do you want to see?
no subject
Of course. [ But now isn’t the time to think about that. He’s back to his infinite cheer. ] What is it?
no subject
no subject
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)