mooninthewater | Sticksandbones IC Inbox

[ Caoimhe had yet to enter this strange building that she had learned recently belonged to Mizuki. Wanting to see it for herself, but also apologize to him as well. The elven woman found herself entering into its domain, with eyes looking around attempting to find where her friend may be. ]

Mi... Mizuki?

[ After a moment of being a bit lost and uncertain, she pulls out a copper wire and sends a sending spell to Mizuki. ]

'Hello, I wanted to talk to you. Are you at the place you built? I am inside as well.. Trying to find you.

[ Mizuki only doesn’t hear Caoimhe because of the headphones he has on, listening to his music, but the sending spell snaps him out of his little trance. There’s something inherently… exciting to hear someone else in his head. The little jellyfish has to take a moment to recompose himself, else he lost to the other voices in his head yelling at him to seek out that oneness he so craves.

He’s good. He’s fine. It’s all okay. Caoimhe hadn’t wanted to commit to something like that anyway. This just felt like a tease…

Mizuki pops his head out from the pile of stuffed animals in the corner of the room, previously totally buried as he pulls his headphone out. ]

Caoimhe!! Hello!

[ LMFAFNJKDSF the way i spliced in some cool dynamic without realizing.... ]

Mizuki! [ Caoimhe's voice lights up but then, her expression seems to look away as she places the wire back into her bag. Giving the look of someone who felt dejected and overall, ashamed of something that happened. After the two were closer, she looked around a bit and let out a slight exhale. ] Um... I wanted to apologize for the other day when... W-When I cast the spell of winds at you.

[ Mizuki’s got a thing for people being in his head, sorry, Caoimhe… He seems to have the sense to not let it get to him, though. He just seems… confused. ]

Huh? Apologize?? Whyever for? [ Beat. ] Oh! Were you worried you hurt me? Don’t worry, my stingers don’t really have nerves.

Yes that as well... [ Caoimhe is glad to hear that he was not hurt by the spell she cast, but it seemed the truth of what she had done did not ail his mind. Although, on the one hand, she felt this was okay and good - the more important truth was that she needed to convey this and let him know how she truly felt that day. ]

Mizuki that day... That day I was more scared that you were going to eat Chung, than I was hurting you or anything else... And I wanted to apologize for that, to think of you so horribly. [ She had begun to look into his eyes, but then, emotions overwhelmed her and she truly felt she discarded Mizuki's feelings at that moment. ] With everything going on within the grove, and everything that I knew becoming challenged... In that moment - I thought, horribly of you and that you would hurt others around you. I... [ Her voice becomes shaky, and she tries her best to continue speaking. ] I cannot watch you when you eat another like you did, such imagery haunts my mind. After everything I have seen so far... Everything seems to blend sometimes... It is frightening, I am sorry.... I did not mean to feel as if you were a monster at that moment.

[ She bows her head, hands at her heart clutching to it tightly. ]

[ Mizuki starts to shift himself out of the pile of toys about halfway through Caoimhe's explanation, closing whatever distance is between them. Finally, when she finishes, he pulls her in for a hug, carefully petting a hand against the back of her head. ]

Shh, you don't have anything to apologize for. I hadn't meant to scare you. I'm sorry for that! I'll eat somewhere more private next time, okay?

How funny you would think I would eat Chung, though~! You are all good people, you know? I'd never do that to any of you while you were still alive, okay? So you don't have to worry about that.

[ He drops his head to settle his chin against her shoulder. ]

Besides, you're not too far off. I mean, what kind of non-monster causes people to go mad and allows his friends to get hurt like that, right~?

[ When the other hugs her, she leans into it more and holds far tighter than he had. ]

... I know... I'm sorry... [ She felt like a bad friend, to have thought that Mizuki would ever do something like that. Unable to accept in that moment, something about him that scared her - it was wrong, of her to not accept him as he is. Especially in a moment, that Mizuki himself was clearly helping them all with. ]

B-But... I don't know why - I don't understand why you eat others like that... [ But Gods consume people, Devils eat souls, and living beings eat animals - it's all the same ultimately. ] ... But, I know Mizuki only does things because he cares about all of us... So I know what you were doing was to help us, and it's okay... [ Her locks of hair seem to drown the other's face within it. Her voice gets a bit quieter, and she holds him still without letting him go. ] S-Sometimes we hurt each other... But... I-It's okay, that's why... That's why I came here to talk to you because even if you didn't realize it... Even if you didn't understand - I still h-hurt you Mizuki, and I wanted you to know... I am sorry... I-I will do better.

Caoimhe, it's alright. There's no reason to be so beside yourself~. You really don't have to apologize to me. I didn't think you were doing poorly or anything. You were scared and there was a lot going on. That's a completely reasonable reaction, okay?

[ He combs his fingers through her hair. ]

I do care about all of you. Would it calm you any if I told you why I did it?

[ She listens to his warm voice, and is glad that he did not find her a terrible friend. Pulling back away from him, she looks to find his face. Attempting to rub the tears from her eyes. ] W-were you H-hungry...? [ I mean why else do you eat? ]

Ehehe, I mean, yes~. But I'm always hungry, so, not quite that.

[ Endless, insatiable, eldritch hunger is a bitch sometimes. ]

My mentor taught me how to… absorb all the goodness around me and share that unto others. But, even more than that, he taught me how to expel the evil within myself.

[ Mizuki offers out his own gloved hand, attempting to help wipe away some of those tears. ]

Taking someone's evil into myself means I can get rid of it. So I try to eat the things I kill to absolve them of that. It's… a little different here, since things "respawn", so it's not like there's an afterlife or anything like that, but… if I can offer just a little bit of solace, I'm going to try.

.. That must be horrible to feel so hungry and be unable to eat... [ She gives the other a quaint frown, concerned over their wellbeing completely. ]

You can... Eat evil..? And... Share goodness...? [ Never in her life had she ever heard about such an ability - it is so unique and intricate... sadly they never got to the eldritch abominations stuff, so Caoimhe knows NOTHING about that mess. ]

If you consume them.. Then... When their soul is freed - they no longer are tainted by the darkness of evil?

[ Her eyes are blinking and she seems to try to put thoughts together. ]

Mhm. Their evil no longer has to affect and fester in the world. They're free to the afterlife without and burdens to bear and able to provide nutrients, too. Really, it's the best way to go.

…

Plus, it'll be nice to not have a massive, rotting corpse over there. [ Just, you know, as an after thought. ]

[ She is still wibbly but... ]

T-that is amazing... It doesn't hurt you in anyway...?

[ She comes from people who use every part of a body!!! Because its important!! They burn their dead so they don't become undead and spread their ashes into the winds!! She totally supports you. ]

[ Crying, Caoimhe, don't support this. ]

Mmmh, well... [ He considers this for a moment. It wouldn't hurt to tell her some form of the truth, he thinks. "Hurts," no, but "alters"... sometimes.

...

He decides against telling her. ]

Not that I can think of, no. Does that make it a little better? I'll still eat more privately, of course.

[ All she heard was: i cleanse the souls of the dying when i eat them. ]

... I... I don't think I can watch - ultimately, the body of a living being is so holy - in itself. Even if they... Die.. ... To watch it desecrated in that way is still hurtful despite your ability...

[ Though the more she thinks about it... ]

... Does that mean... Youre a God?

[ I cant remember if she asked this before - Caoimhe would remember BUT ME THE MUN? GON GAGA. ]

I understand. I don't want you to be uncomfortable. I'm real sorry I scared you before, I hope you'll forgive me for that.

[ Sounds like she already has, of course, but he doesn't want to assume anything. Maybe she came to apologize and also be like "but fuck you for doing that you little bitch" or something like that.

Her next question stumps him a little bit, though. The answer should be "Of course not". And, to some extent, it is, to Mizuki. (But there's a lot of intricacies to We Many, isn't there?) No, no, he can't talk about that. Ah, he's better off just avoiding answering altogether. He doesn't want to continue lying to Caoimhe. ]

What's a god to you, Caoimhe?

..Sometimes, we scare each other. [ Her arms shift gently around his shoulders. Leaning into give him a hug before pulling back again, and letting the two of them comfortably drift a part. ] Sometimes, we get angry at one another... And that's okay, because we all have feelings and... We can come together, to talk about them or overcome things that may not.. Make sense to us?

[ At least in regards to this moment. A pause, as she is hesitant to answer his question. ]

... Do you not..? [ Mizuki may not give his feelings away physically, but in the intricacies of his own personality. Caoimhe finds perhaps her question weighed uncomfortably on his shoulders. ] Do you not, like that question?

You're very kind, Caoimhe. [ He's going to thumb at some of the tearstains on her cheeks. ] Next time, you needn't cry for me, though. I promise, no matter what, I'll always consider you my friend, okay? Worrying otherwise will just make you emotionally exhausted!

[ And he's going to hold her hands now. He's very touchy - if he can't keep hugging, then this works for him. ]

I wouldn't say that, no. It's just certainly a weird question to ask, isn't it~? I mean, depending on what your definition of "godhood" is, maybe we all are? We can't technically "die", we have different abilities, we're from different worlds, we've been reincarnated as entirely new people - there's so much there that could be traits of godhood.

... Thank you Mizuki. [ Truly a kind friend, what more could she have asked for? The gentleness of his touch, wiping away the tears makes her feel validated - here, grounded, alive, appreciated, loved. A tenderness she wasn't inherently always afforded, especially with how easily she could cry.

But Gods..? ]

No, [ She says, kindly but there is a push of certainty to her voice now. ] A God is nothing like us.. Yet you are right, we can become Gods. I have heard legends of those who even Ao could not overlook and granted them ascension... But...

[ As she speaks trying to recall memories and thinks hard on it, the lyre at her side begins to glitten slightly. Exuding an aura of magic itself. ]

Gods have these things called Portfolios.. Yes, without them, the Gods would not gain power from our prayers or respect. Instead, they would diminish in power, and likely disappear into the aetherial planes... I suppose that does not answer your question.

[ She had looked away in thought but returned her eyes towards the other more endearingly once more. ]

To me, the Gods whether they are foul-mannered or gracious. Are beings who live beyond our understanding, they are not meant to be understood but all the same - worshiped and learned from. They are our creators and may not understand us as mortals, but rely on us all the same as we too look to them for answers.

We are the essence of what it means to be synergetic, a foul God should be stopped but to destroyed!?!? Outright, would only mean the demise of Mortalkind.

[ She shakes her head frowning, ]

I merely mean, to myself. Gods are above me, and I can only exist below them ultimately.

Hmm~ hmmmm!!! What a very specific explanation. But I don't think even Gods can be bound by definitions, can they?

[ Happily, he swings their hands together, and sways a little in his spot as well. Mizuki may have been raised ~~by cultists~~ in a Church, but he's really not a religious person. He believes in what the Arbor stands for, and what it once provided and did, but there are some... complicated feelings there. There's some complicated feelings for We Many. There's a lot of... jumbled, complicated... stuff. ]

If the Gods created creatures, then are those creatures not also God? They must be pieces of them, at least, surely? I believe there are simply people who earn respect and even prayer, but those people are not necessarily good, or even gods, right? So, then, where is the divide?

If Gods are simply something we cannot understand, then are many, many Gods that differ between people, even. For instance, I don't understand emotions all that well. Does that make it my God~?

[ Before she has the chance to answer, Mizuki lets go of one of her hands and pulls the other up, guiding her into a little twirl before giving a bright, sunny laugh. ] I don't think anyone can truly define divinity.

Oh you know this..? [ Caoimhe's face lights up as their hands swing about, the lyre at her side still ebbing a hue of magic to it. ] Yes... Yes you are right - Ao took themself and placed a part of them into each one of us, that is why...

[ As swift as she seemed to smile, she frowns gently. ]

That is why the Beast, takes our souls and consumes it - making certain we are never reborn again. He wants the small parts of Ao within us, so that he can become stronger then he is... [ Yes she will talk about the facts of her world like it is nothing, she has done this in the campaign its a thing. ]

But ah -

[ she twirls a bit mystified, did he want to dance? Caoimhe had not danced for some time, and the movement of her twirl made her feel balanced in some way. When she enters back before him. She looks at either side of him and gently comes close and moves a bit as if to dance. ]

That is what I mean... But we, as living beings... We are defined, and part of that is by the Gods in some way...

While the Gods are divided mainly by the power in their hands, but also the laws of the cosmos that we know nothing of... And maybe just, will never understand... Yes... I think that's okay...

I also think that. [ A small smile. ] If Mizuki is a God, he would be a Great God. A kindest one, yes! I would hope your people will dance to the ocean waves, sing your songs, and represent the strength that is in your heart.

[ Most of that flew over his head, sorry, Caoimhe. ]

I do not believe that we are defined, actually. Not when we have so many things that make us unique, if we are truly pieces of a whole.

[ Mizuki will absolutely start to sway with Caoimhe, a songless little dance to keep up the energy. To keep Caoimhe happy. ]

Ehehe, you think so~? It's too bad, then, that I'm not a God. I don't even fit your definition a little bit. I'm just Mizuki.

[ LMAO thats totally fine. She is with the help of Mizuki, actually remembering things from the her that lived farther than she came from. Though she may not be able to retain that Caoimhe's ability or power... She is remembering some of those memories. He is helping, without realizing it. ]

Mm! That's okay - I-I am most endeared by it... [ It is a quiet gentle dance, Caoimhe feels the moment deeply. ] I love who you are, simply as you are, that is why I was so sad... To have felt scared of you before.

I felt that I betrayed you, Mizuki... Despite how much I love you. [ She leans in a bit closer, at least despite the tears that still seemed to sit on her cheeks from moments before. Caoimhe is able to smile truly for the other. ] Thank you for understanding me, and being so kind... Always... I am happy to have met you, am happy that Mizuki is just Mizuki.

[ Mizuki's movements are fluid and very loose. Almost... impossible, for someone without the structure of a jellyfish. But he keeps dancing! It's fun, and he doesn't want to see her cry, and it's certainly a nice contrast from this topic. ]

Mmh, I'm glad Caoimhe is Caoimhe, too. I think... [ A rumbling in his head, the whispers of the collective, the thoughts of We Many, the voice he can never discern from his own. ] I think the Gods are overrated, anyway.

Mm... [ She is grateful. ] I love the Gods. [ Caoimhe says gently, finding herself fascinated by his fluid movements. She almost starts to purposely try to move them so she can see them for herself. ] But I love all living things the most.

[ Somewhere her mother's own heart cries, knowing her daughter is so much like her. ]

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